the-louisville-lounge

My ode' to the paparazzi

2006-12-14T09:54:00.000-08:00

I originally was going to do this post last month when the first cold front came through, but I'm lazy and have a job and a life(kinda). Anyway since it is almost Christmas and the new year, I'll dedicate this post to all the paparazzi who sit on there asses and track down every breathing moment of a celebs life waiting for that shot of gold. heres to them having to get beat down by 400 pound security guards, pushed to the side by competing paparazzi just to bring the magic of a glimpse into someone's personel life. In the past year these are celebs caught on the beach in all their natural glory, no airbrushing and doctored photos, nope this is celebs looking just like anyone else. You get to see the stretch marks, the crusty feet, bad hair, acne, etc. And all this is made possible by some lazy ass with a camera living on cigarettes and junk food and a cell phone for tips. Now I don't know who the rightful owners are to the pics, but alas, I'm going to make fun of them. Now some of these might be older than a year, I don't know and don't fucking care, it's celebs in fucking bathing suits and that's enough for me. So happy Christmas and new-year!
and Alba says"hey you with the camera get a life."
and again Alba rockin in yellow

Hey, I'm Ana Turpin and i'm skinny as a rail but Ricardo Bofill is a fat hairy ass who put me in his movie" Hot Milk".

hey, i'm Beyonce, some fine ass from the south, hence my cowgirl hat ya'll

Damn you guys, i'm Cameron Diaz and i'm with my boy-toy, can't you see i don't have my army of make-up artists to cover up my acne.

well here i am again , i know i got no tits or ass, but i was a model once
and here's me lubeing up my boy-toy JT

Hey i'm Charlotte Church, you probably don't listen to my music but i love showing my bod off

Fuck, this is taking forever it seems, i was going to stop after the last pic of Charlotte, but now blogger has came on and made me type a password because i'm at my limit or some shit. so look for partII, hell at this rate probably partIII and IV, sometime later.

Damn it's been a while!

2006-10-08T20:21:00.000-07:00

i've always said i was a lazy procrastinating ass. well shit, of done went like 3 weeks without a update. that's cause my ass is having to work overtime and still fit in my drinkin' time and watchin' sports time, so that kind of leaves this little pile of dung i have on the web left out. if my dumb-ass new how to market this thing and get some visitors i would spend more time on it.
well actually i have registered a new name and i have been researching hosting sites and bought some web design and html books, i plan on by the first of the year to have a new site going and update with daily garbage that i spew. i've been on the web since 96', so i have amassed something like 30,000 pics and 5,000 vid clips of everything from funny,sick,wtf?,stupid,gross,twisted,hilarious,dumb,disturbing,and everything in between. so my plan is to break all this junk into catagories and throw in jokes and wierd news and useless stats and then surround the pages with sex,sex,sex and porn,porn,porn ads, cause lets face it, fucking sells, and that will be my only way to afford the server costs for having that much content.
alright i didn't do jack-shit this weekend, sat on my ass and watched sports, but i should have went to the Godfather II on preston hwy. They had this chick named Flexx, some kind of contourionist. well heres some links i found on her.

Flexx Promo Vid
Flexx Credits

Flexx performing on stage

as long as CAVIAR doesn't show up next time i go

and as always don't forget to check out the f'in Fox and the thong of the day pics. i listen to the fox more than others cause they play new rock and 90's rock but mix in some AC/DC, Zeppelin,Floyd,Van Halen and other kick-ass rock.
but to get your 90's and 00's fix you can check out WLRS and their myspace page with the sick music of tha ville from unsigned bands. www.myspace.com/wlrsunderground

i want to throw this quick link in here, i don't know who binky is, but damn, this person has alot of fuckin' photos of drunk bitches, check it out Here

here's some upcoming shows i might peep out

and you can always find whats coming up at these links.

Headliners

The Hill

Velocity

The C-J

Ticketweb

man summer is over and i was going to post all the celebs in bikini pics that people have sent me, but you can just check out these sights, these people keep up on the paparazzi pics and talk smack about celebs.

DrunkenstepfatherThe Feeding TubeD-ListedBastardly

Time to PUT UP or SHUT UP!

2006-09-16T08:50:00.000-07:00

It's fucking game day! That's right, the Cards are playing the Cane's at home, this is the chance to show the rest of the college football world they can play with the big-boys. Time to get revenge from that 3 point loss 2 years ago. I had a chance for tickets from my brother, but I didn't know if I would have to work o.t. at my job, so he gave them away to his bestfriend. Well I didn't have to work today, that's why I'm finally posting, I know it's been awhile, I tried to post last weekend but got sidetracked by drinking and watching football. Looks like it will be the same thing again this weekend. I just fucking love college football.
alright, I don't have the time and resources to post everyday on shit but if you local musicians will send shit I'll post it. For celeb shit and pics or gossip, I like gawking at the junk too, it's just in this instant media world, celebs are photographed for everything and people talk about them. When I was young nobody knew what celebs did in their personal time unless they did a interview on TV or a mag. Now we get to see them without professional make-up and lighting doing the mudane shit everyone else does in their daily lives, I touch more on this later.
IF YOUR NOT READING THIS SITE YOUR MISSING OUT!
Go check out the DRUNKENSTEPFATHER this guy is one fucking funny motherfucker. And for other cool places for celeb gossip check out The-Feeding-Tube or D-Listed these people keep up with the daily celeb trash and talk trash about celebs, so enjoy. And The Drunkenstepfather needs a million friends, so visit him www.myspace.com/drunkenstepfather
Alright, as always you need to check out these links for whatever local music is happening.

headlinerslouisville
phoenixhill
unclepleasants
the C.J.
velocityweekly and there free local music jukebox
ticketweb
terryharper
louisvillehardcore
louisvillemusic
ear-X-tacy
Don't forget the Lebowski Fest at the end of the month.

I always liked Tara Reid' s line as bunny saying "I'll suck your cock for 100" and Jeff bridges saying "let me just go find a cash machine". That movie is just classic, well all the Cohen brothers films are twisted and funny. heres some paparazzi pics of Tara showing off those fun-bags, cause I'd let her suck my cock for a 100 also, hell she probably needs its.

And HEADLINERS has a fucking awesome show coming up in October.

you can get your tic's at HEADLINERS or TICKETWEB.COM. but you can also check out these myspace pages of the bands.

In the Clear
Subrosa
Escape from Earth they were feat. On MTV's making the band 3
Fermata
Signal Fading
Under the Rose productions
and don't forget to always check out the "thong of the day" pics at THE FOX and stream kick-ass rock while your sitting on your lazy-azz at your puter.
well this is my post foe now, just with work and my recreational drinking its hard to update daily, so if you don't like my post.....................................................................................................

Concert updates

2006-09-04T17:35:00.000-07:00

Concert updates

I'm sure this show will bleed your ears, I don't know if I'll make it, but damn it I'm goin' try! Get your ticks here .It's at "The Bulldog Cafe" in Fairdale.And don't forget to check out Headliners for all show listings coming up. On Friday the 9th Return to Self,Evil Engine 9#, Chamberflow, and P.Y.L.O.T. are playing. Then on Sept. 14th it's fuckin' Hatebreed w/ Napalm Death, Exodus, and The Black Dahlia Murder, fuck I'm too old for the PIT, but I'll still listen and get shitty drunk.

You can get ticks by going to Ticketweb . I think all these shows are a Terry Harper production.

As always check your Thong of the daypics and stream kick-ass rock and concert info at the one and only FOX , Yeah bitches!!!

I was reading in the paper today about are obesity epidemic, our EPIDEMIC? WTF? Oh how will we get through it? I can stuff my fat-ass for 8 bucks at all-you-can-eat buffets, and grab 99 cent 350 calorie 30 grams of fat sandwiches on every corner, what am I going to do? Put the food down is what I should do. Look I understand some of us(most of us) are getting bigger, the old days people had to hunt or grow food to survive, so of course they were thin. But I remember also learning in class how people have grown over time, like years ago people were maybe 5 ft. On average, then centuries go bye and it's 5 ft.-2 in. And so on. Now it's like 5 ft-8in is average, so maybe were just evolving..............nah, were just lazy fat slobs, drink another sicko's. I do believe there is a fat gene in some people, you know ,the ones who are the width of a door or more. There's a difference in being overweight and then just downright sickening. I might be starting to get a little flabby and have a small gut, but that's cause I drink beer like water, and I'm over 30, my metabolism is slowing down, but since I work physical labor jobs, that helps sweat off some fat. But those people you see with asses that take up a whole couch, they got something wrong in their genes, fuckin bad genes. I was out to eat with my sister and her boyfriend not long ago and a girl and a guy who looked like brother and sister came in with what looked like their mother. Now the girl-n-guy looked maybe mid-20's, but they reminded me of those creatures from the movie "The Fifth Element" who had tiny heads and feet but massive bodies, and the mother(I assume) was itty bitty. I just couldn't help thinking how you could get that fat, I mean I was looking at the guys arms and legs and head, my fuckin big-ass German-Irish head was bigger than his and my arms and legs looked bigger. This guys torso had to weigh more than 2 of me, but he had like kangaroo arms and below his knees toothpicks, it was fuckin weird.

But I'll tell you who doesn't have a fat problem little miss Ritchie, I admit I never found her attractive, but I'd throw my short and stout 6 incher at her, if given a chance, cause she's rich. I need a sugar momma. Even though she's ugly I still liked the tubby Nicole, I guess cause that physique is more likely what I would score with. This new look where she could hang-glide on a dorrito chip or hoola-hoop through a cheerio is nasty, especially when she has those Blu-Blocker like shades on that everyone is wearing, she looks like a fly. What happened to Ray-Bans and Oakley's.

For more Celeb pics and cool links, peep these cool sites.DrunkenstepfatherThe Feeding TubeD Listed

Crikey!!! The Croc Hunter passed away

2006-09-04T17:00:00.000-07:00

R.I.P.

Man that sucks, Steve Irvin known as The Crocodile Hunter got killed in a freak attack by a sting-ray. I used to watch his show all the time, he was just too funny, and crazy. From what I'm understanding, he got poked under his rib-cage and the barb went into his heart, just a freak occurrence. What got my attention was some news show was at a aquarium somewhere and interviewing a sea-life specialist, the barb of a sting-ray this guy showed was like 3 inches long with almost microscopic serarated blades and about the diameter of a toothpick, now I know something that small can still do damage with enough force. But, then they showed a guy who was struck by one years ago in his side, he had a big-ass scar all across his abdomen, so I'm assuming the first guy at the aquarium was showing a baby sting-ray's barb, cause it just don't make since for something that small to do that much damage. I also liked some other interview, where someone was saying he chose a strange and dangerous profession, WHAT?, that was a passion for wildlife, not a career like you or me do. I don't remember my guidance counselors going " do you want to be a teacher or a accountant or a lawyer or do you want to chase the most deadliest creatures on earth?" This guy just had a passion for animals, I'm sad to see him go, I'll miss all the times he was on LENO or Conan. Read more here

CARDS over CATS Baby!!!!!!!!!

2006-09-03T20:54:00.000-07:00

Cards over Cats!!!!!!!

This post was supposed to start over 6 hours ago, but i got side-tracked. Fuck, I was at the bar last night predicting the score a little more conservately than one of my previous posts, I said 57-21, and the cat fan said maybe 37-21 would be more like it. Well damn I was fucking close, if the fucking secondary and special teams would have done their jobs it might have been 60-something to 10, but I'll take 59-28 anytime, It's a shame we lost Michael Bush for the season with a broken leg, oh well thats football, he'll be back next year to finish the job, maybe get that heisman trophy.

I've got my fantasy football teams set, because i'm a lazy-ass I decided to go with the auto-pick in each league, man that was a mistake, my teams suck, actually 2 are decent, but one of them I might as well kick to the curb. i'm in one each at AOL, Yahoo, and ESPN, then I still have the local one with friends, we haven't met up to draft yet. here's a look at the crap i have to win with.

team 1 , QB's- Matt Hasselbeck,Carson Palmer,Mark Brunell--RB's- Shaun Alexander,Chris Brown,DeAngelo Williams,Mewelde Moore,Kevin Barlow----WR's-Reggie Brown,Eric Moulds, Jimmy Smith----TE-Antonio Gates----K- Adam Vinatieri, John Kasay---DEF- Colts, Seahawks.

Team 2 , QB's- Tom Brady, Kerry Collins----RB's- Tiki Barber, Ronnie Brown, DeAngelo Williams, Samkou Gado, Chris Brown----WR's- Larry Fitzgerald, Santana Moss, Keyshaun Johnson, Braylon Edwards----TE-Ben Watson---K- Jason Elam, Matt Stover---DEF- Colts, Redskins.

Team 3(if you can call this a team) QB's- Carson Palmer, Drew Brees----RB's- Lamont Jordan, Chester Taylor, Brandon Jacobs----WR's- T.J. Houshmandzadeh, Donte Stallworth, Reggie Brown, Braylon Edwards----TE's- Antonio Gates, L.J. Smith----K's- Shayne Graham, Adam Vinatieri----DEF- Bears, Bucs.

I don't feel like typing anymore, so don't forget to check out Velocity for upcoming shows. And as always check "The Thong of the Day" pics and stream ear-crippling rock at the FOX . I here "Hatebreed" is coming to Headliners ,so check out the dates and for other shows.

The Drunkenstepfather needs a million friends, check him out at www.myspace.com/drunkenstepfather and his delightful insight on the mundane and his crazy links.

I'm a lazy bastard

2006-08-31T15:11:00.000-07:00

Man I Know I haven't updated in 3 days, but that's because I have a real fuckin' job, it may be meaningless, but it pays the bills(barely). And since this blog is for my own fuckin enjoyment, screw you, well I guess I'm talking to myself,since no one comes here anyway.
Alright then, here's some shit that's going on in the 'ville. Tonight at The Hill we have "Hookahjuice" and "Phyve" rockin' out. Over at J.P.'s Pub&Grub 5610 Outer Loop, "Cornhole" is throwin' down. Then "The Swamp" at Lower Hunters and Cane Run rd. has a BIKE NIGHT tearing up the south end.

I don't get down to the "Highlands" enough anymore, I just love the fuckin' eclectic mix, every genre of people, just kickin' back and lovin' life(in every form). Which I always love going to the Mid-city Mall and hittin' The Back Door Tavern, then going over to COMEDY Caravan for some laughs with friends and then usually back to the tavern for darts and pool till closing, you gotta love the 4 a.m. closing time, then it's time for burritos as big as your head or some sliders from the W.C. lounge, oh, that thought just sounds good, just not the next morning on the porcelain god. Well Heywood Banks is bringing his funny all weekend with Big John Richardson you can't miss these 2 together. Heywood also has some funny stuff on the web, check his Video on YouTube.com

Fuck I just wasted 5 minutes trying to put a funny pic in this blog for this next shit, pissin' me the fuck off when this FREE blog don't work right, well beggars can't be choosey they say. Anywho's I need you local bands to send me shit about upcoming shows, most of you guys have website's but there just holding pages, the ones with actual sites are mostly signed bands from the ville, anyway heres some cool music from the ville.
SOIL
Chamberflow
Two Pump Chump
24 Seven
9 Volt Revolt
Dead City Rejects
7 Day Sun
False
Five Bolt Main
FLAW (FUCKIN broke up)
I am Is
Intak
Faceplant (now Jefferson County Drunk Tank)
Luther
MSD
My Morning Jacket
One With Misery
Quarterbounce
The Sixth Floor
Tantric

well that's all i got for now, but don't forget to get your "Thong of the day" pics at the FOX .
And check out whatever crazy gibberish the Drunkenstepfather is spillin'

Tom Cruise got Tea-bagged by Paramount

2006-08-28T14:16:00.000-07:00

I know i'm late on this shit, but i got to throw my useless banter into this. From what i understand he was let go from a 10 million dollar a year contract, WTF?, Isn't he worth like a HALF billion dollars, I'm sure he sweatin' that. I've always enjoyed his movies, fuck, who can't love "Maverick" and then his roles in "Rain man", "Risky Business", "Born on the 4th of july", and what ever that one he was in with Jamie Foxx where he was a hit-man, that was good-shit. now i seen clips from the crazyness on "Oprah" and with Matt on "The Today Show". Yeh, the guy is off-base on talkin about shit he knows nothing about, but THE GUY MAKES ENTERTAINING MOVIES. Now if Katie will just come back from his spell, or who knows, she may know what she's doin'. I'm sure she's smart enough to know what half of a butt-load of money is. Now if they(cruise) will just let the bubble-baby out, so the rag-mags will shut up.
here's Katie down memory lane, oh, the good ol' days when she just had that sparkle in her, dreaming about gettin knocked up by a big hollywood hotshot to cash that ticket home back to the mid-west. I salute you Katie, you won the fuckin' lottery.

And some screen caps from "Batman Returns"
with nip action

And the "only" nude tittie scene that I know of she's done
Brought to you by BANGEDUP

The Teachings of LiL' kim

2006-08-28T13:28:00.000-07:00

I don't know how old these pics are, but Lil' Kim looks like she's flaunting how she has taken the lil' white girls from the 'burbs and destroyed their parents hopes by teachin' n preachin' in her lyrics about how to suck a cock proper. It's suitable for her because she would be nothin' but a street-wise crack whore if The B.I.G. didn't fuck her. And I guess she's also mocking the middle east community with how free she is and to be able to shake her flapjack titties on TV and let people like Diana Ross play wit them.

As always don't forget to check out the"Thong of the day" pics and Kick-ass rock at the FOX
And as always get your daily dose of ranting and babbling with cool links at Drunkenstepfather

what's kickin' in tha Ville

2006-08-26T11:45:00.000-07:00

Well I just seen that "Almost Fuckin' Noah" is playin' atThe Hill tonight. Man, I remember they used to dominate the local music scene, just an awesome cover band, and original stuff too. i still have their CD from their debut album, I remember the party was held at the old "Brewery", when it still had the Thunderdome. Fuck, that place used to be the place to BE, before they split it up and made "Bar Louisville" and "Have a nice day cafe' ". I guess "Have a nice day" was alright, they had the lighted dance floor and the happy disco and early 80's music. Since i'm a jaded and self-loathing ass that don't dance, I didn't buy it, I'm more of a wallflower. And then "The BAR", it's whole gimmick was "look girls can dance on the bar", whoa , yeah, and you could watch other people in different cities partying at "BAR'S", and they could see you. They had all these T.V's labeled "Charlotte", "Nashville", "Atlanta", "Columbus", and whatever other city. What a fucking waste. What turned me off was, one night after it opened a bunch of friends and me were meeting there to check it out, I normally wear jeans and a t-shirt with Doc's or sneak's or Timberland's on my feet or if it's summer, shorts and t-shirt with sneak's or slide's. Well I went to go in and the bouncer stopped me and said I had to have a shirt with a collar and tucked in and take my hat off. Luckily I had knaki's on and a friend had a polo shirt in his car, so I went in with messed up hair and pissed off attitude, so I NEVER WENT BACK AFTER THAT.
RUSTIC FROG at 1720 old river rd. in New Albany has "Chamberflow" and Evil Engine #9 tonight.
AND today at The Zoo is BEER sampling and food from local microbreweries and restaurants.
The local semi-pro football team The Bulls have a game tonight (I think they play at holy cross high school now)
Drink and drown and fuckin' suck-ao-oke is at J.T.'s variety club 8021 Preston Hwy.(my local watering hole)
You can always find more shit and listing at The Velocity or The C-J
Don't forget to kick-it with the FOX and listen for concert updates and check out"The Thong of the day" pics.
AND for some silly links and celebrity bashing go to Drunken stepfather

I'm so sick of hearing about this....

2006-08-26T10:09:00.000-07:00

Look, I don't disagree that Saddam was a vile,ruthless bastard, but, it shouldn't be are responsibility to be the police of the world. Their never going to have peace over their EVEN if and when we leave. They basically need 3 different countries, one for the Kurds in the north, one for the Sunni's in the middle, and one for the Shiite's in the south. Because obviously these people have never got along and will NEVER get along in...oh,how to say it.."Total peace loving harmony" , yeah right!
Now with that said, I'm all for supporting the troops, their just doing a job and following orders. My brother-in-law is over there, and his mom sends everyone e-mails to let us know what's going on. Here is the most recent, it's a bunch of stat's of what has been accomplished

Subject: WHY DON"T WE KNOW'?I didn't know! How could we?
Did you know that 47 countries' have reestablished their embassies in Iraq?
Did you know that the Iraqi government currently employs 1.2 million Iraqi people?
Did you know that 3100 schools have been renovated, 364 schools are under rehabilitation, 263schools are now under construction and 38 new schools have been built in Iraq?
Did you know that Iraq's higher educational structure consists of Universities, 46 Institutes or colleges and 4 research centers, all currently operating?
Did you know that 25 Iraq students departed for the United States in January 2005 for the reestablished Fulbright program?
Did you know that the Iraqi Navy is operational? They have 5- 100-foot patrol craft, 34 smallervessels and a naval infantry regiment.
Did you know that Iraq's Air Force consists of three operational squadrons, which includes 9 reconnaissance and 3 US C-130 transport aircraft (under Iraqi operational control) which operate day and night, and will soonadd 16 UH-1 helicopters and 4 Bell Jet Rangers?
Did you know that Iraq has a counter-terrorist unit and a Commando Battalion?Did you know that the Iraqi Police Service has over 55,000 fully trained and equipped police officers?
Did you know that there are 5 Police Academies in Iraq that produce over 3500 new officers every 8 weeks?
Did you know there are more than 1100 building projects going on in Iraq? They include 364 schools, 67 public clinics, 15 hospitals, 83railroad stations, 22 oil facilities, 93 water facilities and 69 electrical facilities.
Did you know that 96% of Iraqi children under the age of 5 have received the first 2 series of polio vaccinations?
Did you know that 4.3 million Iraqi children were enrolled in primary school by mid October?
Did you know that there are 192,000 cell phone subscribers in Iraq and phone use has gone up 158%?
Did you know that Iraq has an independent media that consists of 75 radio stations, 180 newspapers and 10 television stations?
Did you know that the Baghdad Stock Exchange opened in June of 2004?
Did you know that 2 candidates in the Iraqi presidential election had a televised debate recently?
OF COURSE WE DIDN'T KNOW!
WHY DIDN'T WE KNOW?
OUR MEDIA WOULDN'T TELL US!Instead of reflecting our love for our country, we get photos of flag burning incidents at Abu Ghraib and people throwing snowballs at the presidential motorcades.Tragically, the lack of accentuating the positive in Iraq serves two purposes:It is intended to undermine the world's perception of the United States thus minimizingconsequent support, and it is intended to discourage American citizens.---- Above facts are verifiable on the Department of Defense web site

NOW I'LL ADD MY 2 CENTS: It all sounds good, but remember the bottom line says "The facts are on the Department of Defense website", we'll if your a conspiracy theroist like me, it's probably just government bias.
BUT, WATCH OUT FOR THE CAMEL SPIDER'S

Australian for Hot

2006-08-25T17:40:00.000-07:00

Man, Foster's might be australian for beer, but Nicole K. is fucking australian for smoking hot! I know these pics are a couple weeks old, but I can't help saying "I would lick the sweat out of her workout clothes". These pics look like she just came from a gym or some sort of workout session. Which is a gym I'd like to be a member of, except I'm a lazy bum, the only exercise I get is walking up stairs to my apartment and that is struggle it's self after a night of doing 12oz. Curls.

And like I always say"The F'in Fox Rocks", so check out the "Thong of the Day" pics or stream kick-ass rock while you sit at your puter. check it FOXROCKS
I might start a "WTF" link's of the day or maybe twice a week, fuck i don't know, but I do know you can find some cool shit at The Drunkenstepfather .

Man I Got To Update More!!!!!!!!!

2006-08-25T16:00:00.000-07:00

I'm a procrastinating bastard, It's hard for me to want to do anything, much less goto work. So since this ghetto blog is for my own enjoyment right now, cause I have no marketing skills, my few readers(who I think is me,myself, and I) will have to bare with me till I get rollin'.
Now with that said here's some cool shit happenin' around town tonight
The COMEDY caravan is having Tom Mabe this weekend and here's the rest of the info

Also tonight at The Hill , "Jefferson Tarc Bus","Naked Garden", and "Sunday Six" are playing.
And "In The Clear" and "Greenwell" are at Headliners and down in the south side at the Third Street Dive 440 s. third st. the"guttersluts","Straight Laced", and "Fenwick" are throwin' down.
Down the road in Bullitt County at the BULLITT COUNTY FAIRGROUNDS all weekend is the Bluegrass 101 festival. goto www.bluegrass101.com for more info and you can always check Velocity Weekly .
Alright now for the wicked shit, the other day I tried some barbecue at some rat-hole place and it sucked, It made me remember how fuckin' awesome Mark's Feed Store is, I used to stop in whenever i went to Ear-X-Tacy or just aboout anywhere down in the "highlands". Thinkin about that makes me bring up the topic of busted pussies or "vagina", last month's PLAYBOY had a article about more and more women are gettin their shit trimmed and rejuvenated, which I find absurd and fucking amusing, because as a man, you would have to have one busted battered and brokedown beaver for most men not to want a piece. I remember watching Stern years ago and he had some porn star named "Houston" on there who was talkin about her lips being a little to long, and Stern and his crew were all telling her she was crazy. So reading the "letters" section of the newest PLAYBOY was comical about different peoples perspective. Well here's mine, look at these pics of shit I would tear into, I ain't scared bitches!!

AND DIRECTIONS FOR ANYONE WHO NEEDS THEM

I know where I'm going tonight, maybe

2006-08-24T11:06:00.000-07:00

Tonight at the "Bulldog Cafe' " at 10619 W. Manslick is "Soil","False","Straight Line Stitch", and "Within a Tragedy" in concert. I'm sure it'll be swell. Now go and tap this keg!!

and at "The Swamp", lower hunter's and cane run rd. "Jefferson Tarc Bus" is playin'

Now if your a comedy fan like me, you have to go to the Comedy Caravan and check out Tom Mabe, he's famous for doing these "Revenge on the Telemarketers" calls, but he's also a fuckin' hilarious dude. And i think tonight is smoke free, so all you cancer stick puffer's might want to keep that in mind.

LOUISVILLE MUSIC ROCKS!!!!

2006-08-22T18:58:00.000-07:00

I want to start off by saying I used to go out to shows all the time, but I'm just lazy now. I still try to hit the "HILL", which is the www.phoenixhill.com tavern. Since most of the places i used to goto are GONE, like "The Toy Tiger" or "P.J.'s tavern" or "TEK World", I just don't see shows like I used to, but I still enjoy are kick-ass music scene and the bands that keep coming out. Bands I used to watch are gone or members have merged with ex-members of other bands or the people just don't play anymore. I used to see "In Human", "Shapeless Matrix", "My Own Victim", "E-Flat", "Incursion502", "Faceplant", "SEN", "Factor9", "Kallus", Luther", "Engrind", "Contortion", "Countermeasure", "Element H", "Tornacade", "Flaw", "Krosmember", fuck that's just some i can remember. Anywhos, I might start posting more about upcoming shows, so on that note, tommorrow at "The Hill" there's a Miss USA bikini contest, and I think an Eddie Metal rock showcase, with "Shatterstone", "XS", And "Jefferson Tarc Bus". But don't hold me too it. You can check out more by going to www.phoenixhill.com , www.shatterstone.com , www.myspace.com/shatterstone or you can always goto the www.velocityweekly.com and check all the listings around town and the FREE music jukebox. Another band that I like is "The F Munky's", their kind of like the "Violent Femmes", it's silly 3-chord music. They play at The Highlands Taproom 1279 bardstown rd. And because i grew up on every kind of music, i enjoy old-school hip-hop, so i heard Frankfort Ave. Beer Depot 3204 frankfort ave. is having 4 dj's spinnin' old-sckool,dub,backbeat, andfunk tommorrow, sounds fuckin' sweet.

i got nothin better to write about

2006-08-21T22:31:00.000-07:00

I got nothin better to write about today, other than The Teen Choice Awards. Which apparently was over the weekend, since every blog i've been on is talkin about it. So here's my 2 cents on the pics i've seen, since i didn't watch the show(cause i don't care). First off, i was amazed at how cheap the red carpet was, it looked like that cheap green nylon stuff people put on there porches except it was spray-painted red, then the back-drops or banners(i don't know what their called) were held up with weights from a gym, i quess cinder-blocks weren't available. Another thing that caught my eye was the podium that was used. I love how parents blame celebs for how their children want to dress, but the podium was a torso of a woman in a bikini, with a tit hangin' out, i quess that's to remind the children how to dress when they go on spring -break and that Joe guy from Girls-gone-Wild comes by. What i also like is seeing celebs photograghed in natural sunlight, i love seeing the flaws(not that i wouldn't bang any of them) that air-brushing in mags cover up. The fake tan spray was in full effect, you could see the runs on some people's legs. I still don't know why Carmen Electra was there, unless she was winning an award for work-out stripper videos or the infomercial for the newest exercise equipment(which must work for her, cause she was the hottest looking celeb i seen). Besides Jessica Simpson's face aging like a prun in the sun, her yams were smokin' hot, until i seen Nelly Furtado's, man, she's build like a brick house. well i'm tired of typing, you can find the links to K-Feds horrible singing debut, and to more celebs pics by going to www.drunkenstepfather.com

ah, i'm back again

2006-08-20T21:59:00.000-07:00

Well i'm back again for another post, keepin' this ghetto blog a rollin'. I figure i'll touch base on how i know jack-shit about HTML again. I'm amazed that i've actually got feedback about how shitty this is and how simple it is to do, but when you've wasted the better portion of your young adult life, filling it with hops and barley and resin and various other things, you become feeble-minded. Now with that said, even though i'm from kentucky, i went to an elementary school that was ranked high in the state when i was there. I remember we had some of the first Apple computers and they taught us shit on them. Then i went to middle school and we had some of the top computers there, i even remember learning how to do basic programming, like how to build a simple game, we learned how to break down each block or pixel(which was big back then) and make a moving picture, like i did a house, and made smoke come out of the chimney and the doors open and close. the bad thing is, when i got to high school it was all about partying and sports, so i missed that window of opportunity before the web blew up.
Now with that bullshit said, i want to point out or remind people that the Lebowski fest is coming around again. i'm a big Cohen brothers fan, so check out www.lebowskifest.com for for details.
Staying with the Lebowski theme, i always loved tara reid's bit part as the "bunny" character, what i can't understand is how every other blog(mostly celebrity ones) rags on pics that pop-up of her. If i could find a girl that looks as good as her and party's like her i'm there. People always want to nit-pick on the slightest celulite on a women's body, when 95% of women will have some. you can give me some cottage cheese anyday and i'll dive right in to the peaches-n-cream. now i'm not sayin' i want a tub full of it, but havin' some dimples on the thighs from behind is just like havin a dimpled smile with sex on the mind. now here's tara lookin' wet-n-tasty on the beach with friends.

Don't forget to get your thong-of-the-day pics at www.foxrocks.com
And thinking of "The Big Lebowski", whenever i think about this guy's blog, i think of John Turturro's character "Jesus", he was the bowler that wore a purple spandex jumpsuit, and he told them"you don't fuck with the Jesus". That's makes me think of www.drunkenstepfather.com , cause if you fuck with that JESUS, you might get smacked, check out his silly canadian beaner-ass.

i gotta find time

2006-08-17T20:06:00.000-07:00

I GOT TO GET ME ONE OF THESE

Cause "Snakes on a Plane" is opening this week, and i'll need something to watch my bootleg copy in while i pound a few back and enjoy it's campiness. I don't usually watch campy cheese-fest action movies, but this motherfucker has Samuel L. Jackson, man i hope they did him justice and had some good editing and CGI. I'm not a fan of CGI , but one of the stars in it is Elsa Pataky. these pics of her with Adrien Brody could CGI me in his place.

And these i could be CGI'ed in as a wet male beaver lookin for a mate..yeah baby, yeah!

Well i don't know how long i can keep this ghetto train rollin. Every time i try to log on to blogger or update i can't sign on, so i might have to kick a few bucks to someone with tech know-how to get my own shitty site rollin' so for now enjoy the slow updates.

All i know is this is where to GO for your "thong of the day" pics, and kick-ass streaming rock-n-roll!! www.foxrocks.com

Don't forget to check out the funniest canadian beaner i don't know, but i enjoy his banter. He needs a million friends so check him out www.myspace.com/drunkenstepfather. And if you piss him off just right, he might make you famous, maybe, anyway check him out at www.drunkenstepfather.com

Local rap artist KD

2006-08-16T10:54:00.000-07:00

I mentioned before local artist KD was replacing Naughty by Nature as the opening act for the Ying Yang Twins at the fair on friday. I've heard he may be opening for Bubba Sparks at headliners on thursday august 17 or for Bones-thug-n-harmony on sept. 3. check out these links foe more info www.bluegrassent.com , www.headlinerslouisville.com ,http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=59023418, and get your local flav on!!

THE STATE FAIR IS BAACCKKK!!!!!

2006-08-16T08:08:00.000-07:00

The State Fair is back!!!!
It's time to see all the carnage commence. I always find a way to put myself that much closer to death with mass consumption of barley and hops with a diet full of artery clogging junk. I never understand why i feel so sick at the fair, maybe it's the warm beer
s that sit out on the tables at the beer tents waiting for me to indulge in that have conveniently become the local watering hole for all the flys that have made their way over from the feces factory that is the livestock expo. then i go and grab some grub, that's served to me from a guy who looks like a parolee, who's probably got hepatitis a,b,and c and maybe malaria and whatever else you can get from ticks or mosquito's, because dude looks like he just crawled out of the forest. I don't know maybe he's pullin' a double shift, he works indoor's putting on the lumberjack show then comes outside to gawk at the young girls while he secretly licks and plays with the weiners,thinking about the good ol'days when he was someone's bitch in the slammer, then adds his own secret sauce to the batter that will become my glorious corndog. But this is usually not enough for my craving,i have to see how much crap i wouldn't normally consume, so i hit-up all the wagons of heart-attack heaven. After this i'll decide i ride a couple rusted contraptions, let's see, do i ride the one that goes in circles, or the one that goes in a circle while going in a circle, or the one that goes in a circle while going in a circle while going up and down, oh i can't decide which will help me get this crap out of my system the fastest, i'll choose all of the above please. the one saving grace about the fair is the free, yes FREE, concerts at cardinal stadium, and as always it's a line-up to please all listening ears. so here they are.....................
august 17- Rick Springfield w/Fireball
august 18- YingYang Twins w/ KD
this show was supposed to have Naughty by Nature but local artist KD who i found out is signed wit a major label is opening. I went to www.velocityweekly.com and tried to find some songs in the free jukebox, but i found his site at http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=59023418
i'm kinda lost on the rap game, but this shit hitz
august 19- Smash Mouth w/tbd
august 20- The Oak Ridge Boys
august 21- Michael W. Smith
august 22- Dwight Yoakam w/ Exile
august 23- Boondocks and Raindrops w/ BJ Thomas and Billy Joe Royal with special guest Gary Puckett
august 24- Lorrie Morgan w/ Mark Chesnut
august 25- Puddle of Mudd
august 26- Blake Shelton and Josh Turner
now i'm lookin forward to see something like this

Well a week or so ago i got my newest Playboy mag in the mail and it has Hef's girlfriends in it. The little sporty one just does something for me, i quess cause years ago i went out a few times with a girl like that, she even resembled that Kendra chick minus the fake tits and whatever other plastic surgery she's probably had. Now i'm not one to knock an opportunist, take Anna Nicole, she provided a service for that old oil-tycoon, giving him happiness in his last couple years and she deserves to be compensated for it. Which brings me to Hef's girlfriends, their providing him with what he needs, cause let's face it, if he was with someone his age he'd be getting hummers from this.............

Now don't get me wrong i'm an opportunist also, if i knew i was goin have a big payoff after afew years, my ass would be all up in a lady like this...........................

but that's just how i am, i am a whore of life, ha-ha sicko's
Now here's some pics of one of Hef's finest out and about, someone caught her out in the street showing of the new Playboy.

where the cows roam

2006-08-13T15:59:00.000-07:00

i went out last night to a local watering hole, and they should rename this place the" pasture" because this is where the fuckin moo-moo's roam. fuck the fire marshall worrying about the people limit,he should crack down on the WEIGHT limit in this place. i know it's drink and drown night and these cows think they might score with a drunk,but even with beer-goggles on don't help these ho's,fuck seeing double vision of these beasts i would think i'm indian jones gettin chased by rolling boulder's. i feel for the poor soul who picks one up and goes home to this
i always remember the old Denis Leary standup "i'm just big boned, NO your big ASSED, dinosaur's are big boned,put the fuckin fork down"
i really don't have much else to ramble about but i'm going back to J.T.'s variety club tonight there's live music tonight and wherever there's live music there's hotties.
also don't forget to get tyour daily dose of cool links and general hollywood trash talk at www.drunkenstepfather.com i'm gone for now.......

2006-08-12T17:54:00.000-07:00

i know the day is almost over,but happy b-day to kentucky's own Rebecca Gayheart, you may remember her from beverly hills 90210,or scream 2 or a movie called jawbreaker,anyway she's from hazard,ky. and i didn't feel like lookin for nudes of her if there's any, so here' some old pics..
UPDATE: I knew there was some nudes somewhere. These kinda look paparazzi, but me thinks there from some wierd movie rebecca was in. their not the best pics, but they are TITS

i'm going keep this post rollin ghetto style, i'm headin out to a dive bar that has 6 bucks drink and drown and that just brings out the best class of people this fine town can offer. but it can't bring out fine ass tail like these ladies i'm about to show,alot of celebrity blogs talk smack about these ladies but not i, because if i could find a girl at the dumps i hang in that look 1/10 as good as cameron or tara, i'd be in heaven
and don't forget to check out www.drunkenstepfather.com for your daily cool links to view and whatever celebrity bashing he's spewing at the moment. he's on a mission to get a million friends on myspace, so check it out at www.myspace.com/drunkenstepfather

2006-08-12T17:27:00.000-07:00

i heard some home-grown girl is a hustler babe now and she's on the cover of the newest hustler. so i quess go to www.hustler.com and check her out or you can follow this link to read about her at AVN.com
i found a couple screen shots of her work for yor viewing pleasure(well actually mine,since i'm the only one reading this thing).

2006-08-12T17:20:00.000-07:00

i missed going down to 2nd and jefferson today to check out the filming of "dead moon rising". a local film maker was lookin for bikers dressed as zombies foe his movie. i was just goin check it out,just to see what it was all about, but again lazy and hung over. you can read about the movie at www.deadmoonrisingmovie.com . i assume heads are goin role in the movie like this .......

2006-08-12T17:09:00.000-07:00

well here i am already bein lazy about this blog, i should also point out that this whole fucking thing is NSFW(that means not safe for fucking work). i'm doing this thing for three people,me.myself,and i. so it seems some more sand people got caught in INDY with maps and layouts of walmarts in kentucky,indiana,and ohio. i quess they were workin with terrorists,because all these fucks can't wait to meet allah. i don't fly often,but now shits all messed up since the U.K. police stopped some more of these guys from tryin to blow up more planes, for some reason they think their flyin to this in the sky.............. WHEN IN REALITY,THEIR JUST GOIN END UP LIKE THIS...........

2006-08-11T16:12:00.000-07:00

well as i sit here waiting for world war 3 or armageddon to start,well what am i saying it's been goin on since the start of time, but those peace lovin(cough,cough) people in the middle east just won't except the jews as equals. shit they won't even except themselves,you got kurds,sunni's,and shite's(?) killin each other,anyway here's some pics about it all

man football season is here!! yeah bitches!, my ass plays fantasy football because i suck at real sports. i'm ready to kick-ass again this year. i won 1 league last year and got 2nd in another.
well i'm going out tonight with some friends,were headin to the GodfatherII on preston. some chick named brittany andrews is there, she's got a site www.brittanyandrews.com or http://tour.clubbrittany.com i found some pics of her,probably old but who cares, i'm sure she's still fine as shit

man this blog sucks at the moment cause i'm just gettin started. my lazy butt is the biggest procrastinating pile of flesh there is. i've been kickin-it dial-up style on the big www since 1996 and i just went broadband 11 months ago, and since i loathe im'ing and instant messaging, i've deciced to talk about crap that i enjoy, so if you wanna ride wit me, wear your helmet ding-a-lings, cause i might offend. and since i know nothing about tech shit, i don't know how long this will last.

i'm going to maybe start doing a daily post on celebs,depends on how i feel(that means if i don't get drunk after work and come home and pass-out) but i'll try and wing it. o.k. today i'll talk about how good nicole kidman still looks,i remember her givin me a funny tingle in my pants as a lad watchin "bmx bandits". now she's finally got away from that quasi cult thing tom tried to suck her into, and is married to a country boy and still rockin that bod,here's some pics of her just gettin done workin out.

well this is it for today, if you enjoy good links to check out and a funny-ass dude, this dude writes some funny shit on his site. i think literally he has diarrhea of the mouth that's how much shit he talks, but it's some of the funniest poop to play in, check him out www.drunkenstepfather.com later freaks

well i got to start somewhere

2006-08-10T20:09:00.000-07:00

Well it seems some college student had some fun with a octopus and let the carcass go in the ohio river. maybe he had filmed some freaky shit like this and the stench killed it.

I can't wait for the big game,you know fucko's, Cards n Cats,i hate makin predictions but, the cards are goin' roll them kitties into the dirt. i say,oh, maybe....65-13...i'm being generous.
this ought to just be the art work in front of the football players from U.K.'s dorm............

it's so easy messin with the cats fans in football, but here's their problem, it's called the SEC and florida,georgia,auburn,alabama,lsu,tennessee,etc.

Let's switch it up to hollywood or make believe land, whatever, talkin about lohan or paris would be easy since everyone does them, or writes about them that is. i've had these old pics of the Barker's, so i'll start there. o.k., travis barker of the band blink-182 fame is divorcing his wife a former playboy girl. now i'm sure he's not hurtin for ass, fuck he's in a band, and if you hang around with anyone from a band(just locally) you'll realize they get t&a very very easy, and it can be a shit band, so since travis was in a sucessful band(many) and has a record label,clothing line, and whatever else, he's not hurting for ass. here's some pics of him and shanna in happier times, i suppose........peace

around tha ville and the world

2006-08-05T12:41:00.000-07:00

well let's get this show going shall we or me(I) that would be.